As the information age and technology continue to grow and take over our daily lives, the way that we communicate is changing rapidly. We communicate quicker than we ever have before rapidly sending emails, voicemails and text messages with the push of a button. I mean, if it weren't for the interweb, my blog wouldn't exist. It would simply be a fifty cent composition book with a hard cover and woven binding, "My Diary" scribbled in permanent marker on the front, modge podged with cutouts from magazines read too many times.
I'm a big fan of the quick communication. I like sending an email to someone at my leisure and getting a response at theirs, often only minutes later. I enjoy chatting with people on social networking sites, having hours long conversations that don't require holding a hot, sweaty phone up to my ear, elbow cramping all the while. I am especially a big fan of text messages for short, simple conversations.
However, as I continue to navigate the world of "relationships", seeking out my perfect soul mate, the text message seems to be making or breaking said relationships. How? It's simple. Any "relationship", be it friendship or other, can be evaluated by the text message.
1. If you text after the hours of 11pm and all the text says is "Yo", the text is not the invitation to begin a conversation, but instead an invitation to copulate... er... it's a freakin' booty call.
2. Text messages should never be received before 8am unless it is an emergency or prior arrangements had been discussed.
2a. DON'T TEXT ME AT 7AM TO SEE IF I WILL WORK FOR YOU AT 2PM, ESPECIALLY WHEN I WAS STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO YOU AT 11PM THE NIGHT BEFORE!!!! Texts should not replace a face to face conversation when the conversation was so simple and could have happened without waking me up! Jerk.
3. Dates should not be made and/or confirmed through text message. This lesson was recently learned the hard way (no pun intended so get your heads out of the gutter!). Said date was scheduled via text message. No communication was had the day of the date, so I knew I was going to be stood up. I decided not to humiliate myself and stayed at home instead. At four o'clock the next afternoon the following text was received:
LL: Yesterday was that spoken word thing wasn't it? Oh shoot, I completely forgot.
First of all, "OH SHOOT"??? WTF? What are you? 60? My mom says oh shoot... not my boyfriends. And it was apparent that you were fully aware of the obligation that you made as you completely avoided communication the entire day when the previous 7 days were filled with text conversations during your lunch break and your evening.
Oh shoot, guess I forgot to respond. Shuckey darns.
Now, there are parts of text messaging that I find enjoyable. For example, I like flirting through text. Sometimes it's just really nice to be able to send a little somethin' somethin' in their general direction to entice them and make sure that they are thinking about you throughout the day. I do NOT condone sending pictures through text of yourself, your body or anything else. (See previous blog regarding the boy who texted me a picture of his erect penis... impressive and disturbing, especially since I'm pretty sure that those weren't HIS flowery pillow cases in the background based on the last time I had been in his bedroom.)
There are other parts of texting that I hate though. This would be the annonymity of it all. I do not know who some texts are from, in which case I generally respond with "Who is this?" or I do not respond at all. Recently, I had a 6 week long fling with a gentleman that I will refer to from this point forward as D. D. is/was a passionate lover (I know, it's geeky but true). He and I had a wonderful time for awhile and then things just started cooling off. I began working more, he wasn't working at all (laid off, but who isn't these days). Here's the lowdown on D.:
*has no job and isn't looking for one
*has been drinking every time that we've talked
*apparently has a couple of kids that he STILL hasn't told me about
*has changed his phone number 4 times, yes, 4 times!!! since I've met him.
When D. texts me, I have no idea who it is and he disappeared, totally M.I.A. for over 4 weeks, then texts me at 2am with "Yo" as the message. The following conversation was had yesterday, times included:
Random number: 2:05am Yo
Random number: 8:39am oh yeah it's d
Random number: 7:24pm so u not tlkin 2 me anymore at all?
Me: 7:56pm Really? I haven't heard from you in like a month and I've been at work all day on a double.
Random number: <7:57pm> oh sorry bout bein mia
Me: 8:03pm Yeah? What happened? Do you even know that T. moved to Wisconsin?
Random number: 8:04pm yea
Random number: 9:46pm so how u been
Now, there are multiple things that bother me regarding this particular text. Emotion is absent. He obviously didn't understand that I wasn't going to respond after not hearing from him for so long. He copped an attitude with ME and then can't type a full sentence or use punctuation. I know for a fact that he owns a phone with a full QWERTY key board so there's no excuse for a lack of vowels, consanants, or ending punctuation.
Guess what... D. now stands for DONE! I'm done!
Make it or break it, but the text message is a helluva way to evaluate a relationship, or lack thereof. Text messaging is great in social situations that require a level of discretion, such as business meetings or large dinners, commenting things that shouldn't be overheard. But don't abuse the privilege. Don't use it as a primary form of communication, only secondary... especially if you're trying to establish a relationship with me. There's nothing sexier than looking into someones eyes while having a deep, heated conversation. The kinetic energy that occurs between two people can't be felt or embraced through some plastic and a computer screen (I'm not knocking internet porn people! But remember, those girls/guys aren't performing for just you... just you and 12 crew members (pun intended), the director, and 4 million other people that are watching the same website you are!)
I'm sure I'll revisit this topic again as there is so much more to say! I didn't even get into confrontation via texts. Til we meet again... go text yourself!
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